more bang for the butt

LONDON -- According to The Times newspaper, a 22-year-old man from the U.K. suffered burns and internal injuries after his buttocks blew up.

The explosive incident occurred in Sunderland, a town 275 miles (443 km) north of London, during the traditional fireworks celebration in honor of the 17th century Guy Fawkes' gunpowder plot to blow up Parliament. Paramedics responded after getting a call about a man who had been injured in a firecracker explosion. When they arrived, they were fortunate enough to watch an instant replay of the incident, which the man's friends had recorded on a mobile camera phone. The images were blurry, but paramedics could distinctly see a man bent over with his pants down, and the firecracker exploding in a white flash.

The victim refused to be interviewed, but a member of his family said he was seriously considering a lawsuit against the firecracker manufacturer. "Those things are downright dangerous," she said, speaking on condition of anonymity. "If there'd been a warning label on the firecracker saying it wasn't intended for orifice insertion, this tragic accident would never have happened."